私このままでいいの? Can I Continue My Life Like This?


M does a lot of things.

She acts in TV and radio shows using her voice. She writes stuff. She also does yoga and dances. A little while back she was working on some theater project, too. She'd often leave me worried when she'd disappear for a week.

As far as I know, M has been living happily just as her heart wishes. She seems to be having a fun life.

But once in a while she'd start talking to me and be like, "Hey, Leo. Do you think I'll ever get married?" or "What do you think I was born to do?" Then she'd bury her face in my fluffy tummy and mumble, "Is it okay to continue my life like this?"

Whenever she says that, I always quietly think, "Sure, why not?"

Everything will work out fine.

Cats don't have role models for life, or an ideal life. We live each day without ever knowing what our lives will be like. Watching M living life each day, I learn that humans have to care about so many things. From what to wear and the kind of title they have, to their age and reputation.

What would I do, if there were standards like that in the cat world? I'd probably be so bored and so tired that I'd surely be yawning and sleeping way more than now.

Cats live according to their own standards.

There are winners and losers in fights. When I was a stray cat there was a time I got punched in the face by some other cat and I broke my tooth. That hurt. But just because I lost one fight, I don't think of myself as a loser. There are no top cats or under cats (dogs have underdogs, because they are dogs). As cats, we are our own standards, so we don't compare ourselves to others.

I have been told, that there are a variety of cats who live differently than I do. There are cats who don't have a home, unsure if they can find food for that day. Or cats who live in a tower mansion and eat a stomach full of expensive food everyday. And then there are cats who live in a tiny apartment and eat simple food, but would once in a while chow down luxurious canned food.

I've experienced life as a stray cat, and as a cat with a home. Before I met M, I used to live in a warm place with a roof, but one day, out of the blue, I was out on the street. I never returned to that house again.

It sucked being a stray cat. It was cold at night, I could never find any clean water, and I slept on soil, desperate for somewhere soft to sleep on. I was so, so hungry. I walked powerlessly searching for food in smelly trash bags. I had no idea why I was on the street, with my feet touching such a hard surface. But I just kept walking.

Then one day, I was rescued by M.

The fact that I'm alive now, makes me happy.

I can eat all the cat food I want until I'm full. I can drink all the water I want, and sleep in a basket with a heavenly soft blanket. I can hear M giggle at me when I say something in my sleep. And at night, M will hug me tight in bed - I love how warm it feels.

When I was a stray cat, I had no idea what was going to happen to me. But I just focused on trying not to die.

Then, it worked out in the end. Actually, I'm pretty lucky.

So, this I can say.

Even if things are rough and you have no idea what is going to happen to you in the future. And if you're thinking, "Is it okay to continue my life like this?"

Just focus your thoughts on what's right in front of you.

Then, something lucky might happen someday. Kind of like how it did to me.

It's all right. Everything will work out fine.
























大変なことがあっても、これからどうなるかわかんなくても。そして、このままでいいのかな? と考えているとしたら。